lol. i never finished sex and the city; i maybe got to season 2, and that was years ago. but in this moment——whipping out my laptop to journal (which i never do. i’m more of a by-hand or iphone notes app type of guy. which is normal.)——i feel sooooo carrie bradshaw. maybe i’ll try watching it again, but it feels too late. or too cliché? plus, i genuinely get the gist. anyways

…i just had this thought: i think sometimes i date people because i’m curious about the kind of person i attract. like a census… i’m collecting data. earlier today, during a pause at work and a moment of quiet introspection, i drafted a tweet that said: devotion is the only romantic thing to me; everything else feels like a lick. womp womp.

feelsi hate wasting my time, this is just a stream of consciousness now, i HATE wasting my time. everything feels like a game, and that’s fine, but it’s only fun when you really know exactly what game youre playing. no need to select hard mode when youre only equipped for easy mode. you know what i mean?? one of the songs i have coming out next month (Forget We Ever Met. i’m sure future mindi will link it when it’s out. hiii future mindi) is about recent game over i had. whatever, it’s life, it’s art, it’s beautiful. i’m dramatic and intense and i think that’s what makes all of this so fun. i c